"Crumbs of My (Deleted) OKCupid Profile - Part 11 - The End…"
(to read all posts in this series, click here)
I’ve really been hesitant to write and post the final entry in this series. It’s not that I’m being over-sentimental (though, I am frequently that about many things… such as novelty loofas), I just wasn’t sure how to wrap it up. I think I’ve figured it out.
My experience using OKCupid was at times strange, at times upsetting, and at times uniquely uncomfortable… but it wasn’t all bad.
YOU SHOULD MESSAGE ME IF
…if you live within about 10 miles and have pizza to share with me.
Seriously, it’s really unlikely that I’ll message you because it feels a lot like approaching women in public and as I understand it, that can be a really uncomfortable experience for a woman, particularly when the attention isn’t wanted, so I try not to do it.
I am not looking for someone exactly like me. I’m looking for someone to share things with.
- - -
I just realized these kind of profiles usually have some a place to describe what you’re looking for, so I guess this is that place maybe?
I have noticed that some things I find attractive in women include braided hair, eyes darker than black holes, the ability to beat me up using some kind of martial arts training, being vegetarian or vegan, liking hockey as much or more than I do, a need to produce things and create—not necessarily art, speaking multiple languages, knowing way more than I do about nature and/or animals (which isn’t very difficult), being Canadian, spending a lot of time being sarcastic on the Internet, having nice shoelaces that they stole from the President, a big mouth and a small chin, and big teeth.
So I guess you should message me if you have any or all of those things going for you, too.
I don’t know exactly what I am looking for and really, I think it’s better that way. I don’t intend on planning out my next relationship, though, obviously, I am looking for one.
(I am not interested in anyone from Philadelphia. I have my reasons.)
I had some odd online interactions through OKC, but I mostly met nice people who I liked a lot. I’ve mentioned this before, but I actually made a few great friends—people I am very lucky to have in my life.
Usually, when I’d meet someone from the site, we’d fairly quickly discover we were just looking for different things or there just didn’t happen to be much of any kind of attraction between us, which was disappointing, but there’s nothing wrong with that.
Still, I deleted my profile in frustration at my lack of success. I thought, during my time on OKC and for a long time after that there was just something off about the sort of people drawn to use that site… conveniently ignoring that fact that I was a person who had been drawn to use that site. I thought maybe it was just particularly difficult to date in LA (I still think it is, but that wasn’t the real problem).
Later, I thought maybe I would have had more success if I had only written a better profile with shorter (read: no) lists of anime that I like and less self-referential humor, or maybe if I had answered more survey questions, posted better pictures, and overall, spent more time committed to finding dates. I thought I would have had better success if only the women on the site had done the same (except the part about anime lists).
“It’s not you, it’s me” is such a terrible cliché and every day, I try to remember one of the best notes a director ever gave me: “It’s not about you, Chris.” Well, normally, no, it’s not about me. This time, it was.
The truth is, I was lonely, but I wasn’t ready.
OkCupid was a bad idea. Dating was a bad idea.
It’s never a good idea to go looking for love because you’re lonely. You’ll only end up disappointed. Trying to treat loneliness with dating is like trying to treat hunger with gum. Sure, it’s distracting, but you’re just going to end up angry at yourself, angry at the gum, and you’re still going to have to go to bed watching Bob’s Burgers alone at night, so what even was the point?
At that time, I didn’t really want to meet someone and begin a serious relationship with them. No, I don’t mean I was just looking for casual sex, I mean, deep down I didn’t really want to fall for someone or start sharing parts of my life with another person. I didn’t even really want to go out on regular dates with someone. I just wanted to stop feeling so… whatever it was I was feeling all the time.
Maybe now it would be different, but how can you ever know for sure that you’re ready? Regardless, at this point I’m more interesting in pursuing my interests and passions. I think that will more likely lead me to someone who is perfect for me than a dating site, anyway.
Wish me luck. (I’ll need it.)
A person can change at the moment when the person wishes to change.
So I’ve been back from Austin, TX for a little while now and I have to say, it’s been an amazing month or so. I miss all of the cast and crew of Found Footage 3D a lot, but I’ve been lucky to stay pretty busy since I’ve been home!
Speaking of Austin, I also want to send out a big congratulations to all of the people I’ve been lucky enough to meet and get to know over the years at Rooster Teeth Productions.
They deserve all the success they’ve had and so much more! I can’t wait to see what this project becomes.
I’ve seen Rooster Teeth grow and change a lot over the last ten years since I joined their site and I can say without reservation, I’ve enjoyed every minute of it. It was especially exciting to see the company grow over the years and hire community members who had skills the company needed. More than once I wished that I had video editing experience or anything on the production side that I could offer to a company and group of people I admired and respected so much.
Reading about Lazer Team and their record-breaking crowdfunding campaign was like falling into a pool of “FINALLY.” Finally, I get a chance to offer the skills I’ve been working on for longer than I’ve been a member of this community. Right now, I’m just trying to get an invitation to audition. Thankfully, I have a manager to help with that!
Wish me luck!
Don’t know who or what Rooster Teeth is? Take a look at their amazing work at www.roosterteeth.com and the Lazer Team crowdfunding campaign at https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/lazer-team-by-rooster-teeth
Also, check out this doodle from 2010 by Amy T. Falcone (www.cliquerefresh.com), the first time I met Burnie Burns and Matt Hullum of Rooster Teeth, up in Toronto!
Tonight, I took Chris w/ me to the #YouTubeSpaceLA luau. He won an eating contest, we saw fire dancers, and everyone got lei’d. #YouTube #Microbrien #me #luau #fire
Thanks for inviting me, Michael! It was a good time!
To everyone else out there… Protip: never eat any poi. Not ever. Especially don’t eat about 6 measured cups of it in 6 minutes…
"Crumbs of My (Deleted) OKCupid Profile - Part 10"
(to read all posts in this series, click here)
This is the only section I will edit (by omission only) significantly.
Originally I wrote a good amount in the next section of my profile about post-concussion syndrome. I very probably have it, though I have not been diagnosed.
Actually, I am really confident I have PCS because (in addition to other concussions) once, while playing hockey, I hit my head really hard, blacked out, thought I was dreaming for the next eleven minutes even though I was very awake, and experienced temporary memory loss.
I still have some memory issues today. I’ll often forget the details of conversations and I tend to have a very hard time remembering the details of conversations I have via text (e-mail, IM, text messaging, etc).
Yes, this is a very convenient excuse when I happen to just not pay attention to what people say. However, maybe the fact I’m so easily distracted by bright lights and a lot of movement is also a symptom of PCS, so who’s really to blame here?
That said, I’m also aware that part of my memory problem is due to insecurity that I might have a bad memory problem… it’s frustrating to say the least.
On the other hand, my concussions gave me this cool thing where in my eyes, one pupil is always more dilated than the other which I think is awesome, so it’s kind of a fair trade.
THE MOST PRIVATE THING I’M WILLING TO ADMIT
I don’t really like sleeping alone.
You’re the one acting like a lunatic!
It’s the main cast of the next books of Classic Alice!
Kate Hackett, Tony Noto, Elise Cantu, Chris O’Brien (of http://chriswritesgood.com), and Reid Cox — official press release coming soon.
Connect with the show
Don’t forget to reblog/like/share/tweet!
I can’t say how excited I am to be joining the cast of Classic Alice! Look for me in new episodes beginning August 5th at classic-alice.com!
That’s me! I’m in that now! Woo!
WHY IS IT WHITE
OMG KAREN YOU CAN’T JUST ASK NETFLIX WHY IT’S WHITE
Anonymous said: Who's the internet lady that you love?
I’m not really in love with them. I don’t know them.
I have Internet crushes on a few women I’ve encountered online that I’ve never met in-person, but I’d rather not say who because it’s not entirely unreasonable that they could see this and I don’t want to make them uncomfortable.
Maybe it would be flattering, but I really wouldn’t want any of them to come across a post like this and think I’m following their every tweet, blog post, instagram, vine, or whatever and that they can’t do anything online without me here… watching… waiting… because that is really not the case. I just really like what they do, I respect them, I admire them, and if they lived anywhere near me, I’d really like to go on a date with them.